It takes a brave and daring soul to stay motivated. The fear of failure is a leading killer of motivation. Starting something impressive isn’t for the “faint of heart” but you can overcome fear and take that critical leap of faith.
But, if you think it’s tough to motivate yourself to try once, try motivating yourself after failing. I won’t sugarcoat this. failure sucks. It’s stressful. You want to curl-up in the fetal position — permanently. I have failed. Great men have failed. So has Bill Gates, Arianna Huffington, Jeff Bezos, Thomas Edison, Vera Wang, Tim Ferriss and Lawrence Ellison to name just a few.
Don’t let the statistics and nay-sayers stop you from pursuing your dream. While failure is always lurking around the corner, it’s not the end of the world when a failure happens.
So, you are going to fail but you can always pick yourself back up. This list will help you — but no one can do the list for you. You will have to take these for yourself. It may be hard, but take a step into your future.
ACCEPT IT, LEARN FROM IT AND MOVE ON
I get it – I honestly do – you’re still in disbelief. You’re heartbroken. You’re freaking out over resources lost. The thing is, the sooner you accept that you failed, the sooner you can learn from the mistakes that you made and start moving-on.
Think about what you could have done differently. What mistakes did you make? Confront that so you won’t repeat them in the future. Trust me. It will help you grow both professionally and personally. But here’s the kicker — don’t dwell it on for long. Accept it and start looking towards the future.
As the legendary Johnny Cash once said, “You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past. You don’t try to forget the mistakes, but you don’t dwell on it. You don’t let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space.”
TAKE TIME TO HEAL EMOTIONALLY
Even after you’ve accepted that you failed, you’re won’t be over it in a day or two. It’s a process that may take weeks or months. You may never get over it completely. That’s all right. You can learn to move through this failure. Remember, just don’t dwell on it.
I heard of a woman whose spouse was killed in a car crash. She had the business to run and her small children. She had to keep going. She began moving through her tragic loss by being alone and breaking down completely. But she did this breaking down only once a day, in her closet, for 10 minutes. She set a timer and allowed herself deep, dark, loud grief.
Her way works for her. You have to find something that works for you. Save yourself. Until you’re in a better spot emotionally and mentally, take the time to heal.
When are you least motivated? It’s when you’re down in the dumps. procrastination is a mood-management technique, albeit (like eating or taking drugs) a shortsighted one. But we’re most prone to it when we think it will actually help…
“Well, far and away the most procrastination will occur among the bad-mood students who believe their mood could be changed, and who had access to fun distractions.”
When we’re happy, however, we’re more productive and successful.
So, how can you get positive?
There’s no right answer. But, it could be anything from watching your favorite comedy to hanging out with optimistic friends. For me, writing down what I’m grateful for everyday improves my mood. It reminds me what I have instead of what I don’t.
Occasionally something like being grateful seems almost frivolous or silly. Because it is easy, you think it won’t work. When you have just lost your business — try the silly stuff. Try things that you think won’t work. Try gratitude, even if just for the fact that gratitude has been studied and is a proven technique.
I also find the time to give back by volunteering with nonprofits. In fact, scientist have found that acts of kindness can lead to happiness. As an added bonus, working with nonprofits is a great networking opportunity. Stay positive, stay motivated.
Physical activity, whether it’s jogging or yoga, releases mood boosting endorphins and alleviates stress. Simply put, exercising increases those feel-good chemicals in your brain while also improving your mood.
Additionally, physical activity can act as a form of meditation. It keeps your mind focused on your current single task, which can help eliminate those feelings of doubt. When combined, these elements have the power to produce feelings of motivation, possibility and accomplishment.
PLAN YOUR NEXT MOVE
“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, don’t sit at home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”Dale Carnegie
Inaction is a serious motivation killer. Instead of getting stuck in a pit of failure and feeling sorry for yourself, start digging yourself out of this hole. Plan your next move. This could be as simple as getting your finances in order, organizing your home office, writing down what you excel at. Even beginning on conducting some early market research for your next project works.
FIND A RELIABLE, UNDERSTANDING AND SENSIBLE FRIEND
When at my lowest, I have a friend I can turn to who turns around the atmosphere instantly (I’m sure he’s reading this post and smiling). He’s so funny that even the way he talks alone just makes me laugh. Our ideas and philosophies of life agree and when we talk, it’s like we know each other’s mind. We all need someone we can turned to who helps in guiding us through our reinvention. I was fortunate enough to have that person in my life, but what if you don’t have a friend like mine? Remember, they’re everywhere.
“Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.”Proverbs 27:17 KJV
They could be your girlfriend, boyfriend, course mate, siblings, mother, father, uncle, aunty, classmate, pastor, imam, spiritual leader, lecturer or even your superior at work. Seek their honest advice and use that advice as a road map to help you get to where you want to go.
Rewards feel good. In fact, research has found that rewards are responsible for three-quarters of why you do things. So whenever you have crossed off an item on your to-do-list, give yourself a little reward. You’ve earned it. You need to believe that you not only need this reward — but that you deserve it.
If you’re stuck on how to reward yourself, some ideas would be to take yourself out to breakfast. Take a vacation, go goofing around online by taking quizzes or watching the latest viral vids. Stay chilled, stay motivated
REHEARSE PAST SUCCESSES
Remember, failure accompanies success. In other words, there were moments where you were succeeding. Look at pictures to recall vividly. Recall some of those past successes and rehearse them aloud. It’s exiting and makes you stay motivated.
Focus on the actions, as well as your choices, that led to that success. Don’t be afraid to give yourself a little verbal praise and affirmation. After all, it was you who was responsible for those successes. If you feel a little awkward saying affirmations out loud, at least write down your accomplishments in a journal or notebook.
“I am not judged by the number of times I fail, but by the number of times I succeed: and the number of times I succeed is in direct proportion to the number of times I fail and keep trying.”TOM Hopkins
GET OUTSIDE OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE
Your comfort zone feel all safe and warm. But stepping outside of that comfort zone challenges you to try new things and have new experiences, which in turn could open the door for new business opportunities.
When what you do fail, try new things, don’t be stuck doing the same thing the same way and expecting different results. If You didn’t step outside of comfort zone, I wouldn’t be motivated to get to some places. Blasting out of comfort zone pushed us to take action.
FOCUS ON OTHER GOALS
When we fail at a big task, like a business, it’s hard to get some things back. One easier way to boost our confidence is by succeeding at smaller tasks. Instead of worrying about starting a new business right away, focus on smaller and more achievable goals. It’s those small steps that will lead you to success. Always remember, a win’s a win – no matter the size.
GET PEER PRESSURED
Believe it or not, peer pressure actually helps kids more than it hurts them. In this case, this means surrounding yourself with positive people. Find those who are supportive and encouraging.
Yes, you need someone who can hear your whoa’s and tell you it will be okay. Not wet blankets. Stay with people that makes you stay motivated
ENVISAGE YOUR SUCCESS
Sometimes after failure all you need to do is close your eyes and imagine what success looks like to you. See yourself where you want to be. How did that make you feel? Pretty awesome, right? Visualization has power. Use that power for your benefit. Visualization provides strong emotions which can motivate us.
On behalf of My Woven Words: where we only write what is right, I wish you what you wish yourself!
By Johnson Okunade
I’m a Writer, Humanitarian, Historian, Computer Scientist, Blogger, Web Developer, Web Content Creator, Culture Activist, A Bowen University graduate (Proudly Bowenian), and a friend-to-all. Feel Free to Contact me on Anything.
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