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Having a crush can feel like the most amazing thing in the world. There are the butterflies when they like your new Insta pic and the heart-dropping, soul-echoing feeling you get when you spot them across the cafeteria. IT’S THE BEST. And since it can feel so great, it also means that it can feel AWFUL. If your crush dates someone else, get ready to feel like someone punched you in the feels. They didn’t text you back? Ugh, that means you’re going to check your phone ALL. NIGHT. LONG. Have a crush that you know is a player who will only leave you brokenhearted? Get ready for tears. Do they have no idea you exist? ::Insert ghost emoji here::

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Sometimes you just need to cut a crush loose. The ups and downs can be too much to handle, and taking a step back can be crucial when it comes to self-care. Plus, NO ONE is worth that much trouble. Seriously. Here’s exactly how to get over them…

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Know Why You’re Crushing

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So how do you know if you need to get over your crush? The answer: When the bad feelings start to outweigh the good. Do you feel amazing after talking to them or do you leave feeling a little empty? Are you trying to get their attention and it’s just not happening? Are you seeing a side of them that you don’t like? Sometimes you might want to get over a crush because the rollercoaster ride of emotions is making you want to vom. Maybe you feel awkward and embarrassed around them and you just don’t want to deal? There are a million reasons why a crush might not become more. Love and even ~like~ can be complicated AF. If you feel like something just isn’t right, TRUST YOURSELF. I know you probably hear this from your squad all the time, but seriously: If they are not treating you like gold, they are DEF not worth it.

A Little Distance Goes A Long Way

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Now for the moment we’ve all been waiting for…how to get over a killer crush. One thing to think about: Crushes are kind of like bug bites — the more attention you pay to them by itching and scratching, the harder it is to heal in peace. Even though you see them in school, it doesn’t mean you need to suffer through them popping up on your Snapchat and dominating your IG feed. Say it with me: UNFOLLOW THEM. (Even though we know you probs won’t – we still love you!). But seriously. Try not to stalk them online – it’s only going to make you feel like more of a trash fire.

You Do You

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Another tip: GET BUSY. And be super proactive about it. Max out your group text with plans for stuff to do on the weekends and, if it makes you feel better, Instagram the hell out of all of your awesome friend dates! Maybe there’s a hobby you’ve wanted to pick up or an afterschool club you dropped that you want to get back into? Do it! If someone isn’t going to make time for you, then you need to make more time for yourself.

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Don’t Rush It

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OK, this next one is a little tricky, but stay with me: Getting over a crush can make you feel like your heart is literally on fire. Why? Because these tricky things called feelings have minds of their own. That being said, sometimes you just need to acknowledge your feelings to help get over something. Rather than telling your feelings to GTFO, try taking a look at them, giving them a hug, and then just letting them chill for a little. Forcing yourself to get over it can sometimes make it worse.

Stay Strong

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We’re not going to sit here and tell you that it’ll all be alright, that you’re young and you’ll have so many relationships after this. (We’ll leave it to your rents to say all that stuff.) But we will say that your feelings are real and true because you have depth and brilliance and, seriously, who would be stupid enough to pass that up? WE SEE YOU. You got this, girl.